“You haven’t even experienced life.”
The comment on one of my adult children’s social media posts stopped me in my tracks.
The post was simply this… thought I wouldn’t get married until I was 30, but I met my person and got married at 22. God’s plan for me was better.”
And then there is this…
“Is she crazy?”
That one references my adult daughter who has 8 children.
Yes, 8.
Ages 7 and under.
And I understand the question.
By societies standards, that is a lot of children.
But the question and the statement both reveal something about our culture.
Getting married and raising children are not as esteemed as they once were.
Self-fulfillment is at the top of the aspirational chart.
Be what you want to be, even if that is a cat, because you know… that is sane.
But marry young or have eight children, and cue the men in white coats, because girl, you are crazy.
Don’t misunderstand.
I am not saying everyone should get married at 22 or that you should have 8 children.
I am saying that neither of those things are necessarily bad and we should stop acting like they are.
If God brings you your person at 22, you don’t need to run the other way in pursuit of more life experience.
Press in and experience life together.
It doesn’t matter how old you are, you will never have all the answers and if you are doing it right, you will always be growing.
So, physical age is relatively inconsequential.
I have met people in their 50’s who have the emotional maturity of an 18-year-old and who are so self-centered that marriage at their age, with all their life experience, would likely be a dumpster fire.
Ok.
Now, what about the crazy woman with all those babies?
I am not going to lie. There was a time when even I was concerned about my daughter and her husband having more children.
But then I looked at the world, and I thought, if anyone is having a lot of children, I am glad that it is people like them.
Because they will, by God’s grace, raise strong people who know what it looks like to be an adult.
And frankly that is what our culture needs.
Grownups.
I mean just look around.
The world seems to be in a constant state of temper tantrum.
But parents know this…
Grownups stand strong in the face of a temper tantrum because they know that not everything a child wants is good for them.
We need more grownups in our world.
Grownups who aren’t addicted to self, screens or public opinion.
Here is my heart for you…
Stop worrying about how much Instagram worthy life you can cram in before you get married and have children.
If you love Jesus, you know that this world isn’t all there is and by the power of the Holy Spirit you have both the freedom and the power to not live as if it were.
I want to end by saying that I know some of you want to be married!
And I know some of you want babies.
You are waiting and hoping.
And it seems like you have been waiting forever.
If you are still with me, let’s revisit something from my daughter’s post.
The words, “God’s plan for me”
Oh, sweet one,
He’s got you.
He knows your heart.
He hears your cries.
His plans for you, whatever they are, will not be thwarted.
I pray that you can rest in that.
And young wife, young mother…
You are among the most influential people in the entire world.
I know it doesn’t feel like that in the midst of changing diapers or wiping noses.
I pray that you will use your influence wisely.
Embrace your calling.
The hand that rocks the cradle…
Momma Vie
For more check out her website at: https://mommavie.com/